Believing Is Seeing
Romano Guardini
Thomas declared, "Unless I see the nail marks in his
hands and put my finger where the nails were, and put my hand into his side, I
will not believe it." John 20:25
Thomas appears to have been a realist - reserved, cool,
perhaps a little obstinate.
The
days went by, and the disciples went on living under this considerable tension.
Another
week, and they were together again in the house, and this time Thomas was with
them. The same thing repeated itself. Jesus passed through closed doors,
stepped into their midst, and spoke: "Peace be upon you!" Then he
called the man who was struggling against faith: "Let me have thy finger;
see, here are my hands. Let me have thy hand; put it into my side. Cease thy
doubting, and believe!" At this point Thomas was overwhelmed. The truth of
it all came home to him: this man standing before him, so moving, arousing such
deep feelings within him, this man so full of mystery, so different from all
other men - He is the very same One they used to be together with, who was put
to death a short time ago. And Thomas surrendered: "Thou art my Lord and
my God!" Thomas believed.
Then
we come upon the strange words: "And Jesus said to him, 'Thou hast learned
to believe, Thomas, because thou hast seen me. Blessed are those who have not
seen, and yet have learned to believe!'"
Such
words as these are really extraordinary! Thomas believed because he saw. But
our Lord did not call him blessed. He had been allowed to "see," to
see the hands and the side, and to touch the blessed wounds, yet he was not
blessed!
Perhaps
Thomas had a narrow escape from a great danger. He wanted proofs, wanted to see
and touch; but then, too, it might have been rebellion deep within him, the
vainglory of an intelligence that would not surrender, a sluggishness and
coldness of heart. He got what he asked for: a look and a touch. But it must
have been a concession he deplored having received, when he thought on it
afterwards. He could have believed and been saved, not because he got what he
demanded; he could have believed because God's mercy had touched his heart and
given him the grace of interior vision, the gift of the opening of the heart,
and of its surrender.
God
could also have let him stay with the words he had spoken: in that state of
unbelief which cuts itself off from everything, that insists on human evidence
to become convinced. In that case he would have remained an unbeliever and gone
on his way. In that state, external seeing and touching would not have helped
him at all, he simply would have called it delusion. Nothing that comes from
God, even the greatest miracle, can be proven like 2 x 2=4. It touches one; it
is only seen and grasped when the heart is open and the spirit purged of self.
Then it awakens faith. But when these conditions are not present there are
always reasons to be found to say solemnly and impressively that it is all
delusion, or that such-and-such is so because some other thing is so. Or, the
excuse that always is handy: We cannot explain it yet...the future will
enlighten us about it!
Thomas
was standing a hairsbreadth away from obduracy and perdition. He was not at all
blessed.
Blessed
indeed are "those who have not seen, and yet have learned to
believe!" Those who ask for no miracles, demand nothing out of the
ordinary, but who find God's message in everyday life. Those who require no
compelling proofs, but who know that everything coming from God must remain in
a certain ultimate suspense, so that faith may never cease to require daring.
Those who know that the heart is not overcome by faith, that there is no force
or violence there, compelling belief by rigid certitudes. What comes from God
touches gently, comes quietly; does not disturb freedom; leads to quiet,
profound, peaceful resolve within the heart.
And
those are called blessed who make the effort to remain open-hearted. Who seek
to cleanse their hearts of all self-righteousness, obstinacy, presumption,
inclination to "know better." Who are quick to hear, humble,
free-spirited. Who are able to find God's message in the gospel for the day, or
even from the sermons of preachers with no message in particular, or in phrases
from the Law they have heard a thousand times, phrases with no quality of
charismatic power about them, or in the happenings of everyday life which
always end up the same way: work and rest, anxiety - and then again some kind
of success, some joy, an encounter, and a sorrow.
Blessed
are those who can see the Lord in all these things!
Romano
Guardini, “Believing Is Seeing,” from
Jesus Christus: Meditations.
Copyright © 1959 by Regnery Publishing, Inc. All rights reserved. Reprinted by
special permission of Regnery Publishing, Inc., Washington, D.C.
